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About lorenzo

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    Advanced Member
  • Birthday 02/04/1962

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  1. McCormick OS6 Restoraton

    I am anxious to see the finished tractor. It's Very worthy of your efforts . From what you have shown us so far I'm sure it's going to turn out great. Keep up the good work.
  2. New joke

    Ok then, What goes in Hard and stiff? And comes out wet and soft?
  3. IH hyd seat cushions & fender radio

    Would that be the correct style seat for a Black stripe 1066? except for the color. That looks like it would be much more comfortable. I have been told mine is incorrect and should be all black. Here is a picture of what I currently have on the tractor.
  4. US olympic gold medal winner my butt

    It just doesn't mean anything anymore. The younger generation dosent get it I guess.
  5. New joke

    TIPS FOR A LASTING MARRIAGE . Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little beverage, good food and companionship. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays.2. We also sleep in separate beds. Hers is in California and mine is in Texas.3. I take my wife everywhere... but, she keeps finding her way back.4. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen.5. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.6. She has an electric blender, electric toaster and electric bread maker. She said "There are too many gadgets and no place to sit down!" So I bought her an electric chair.7. My wife told me the car wasn't running well because there was water in the carburetor. I asked where the car was; she told me "In the lake."8. She got a mud pack and looked great for two days. Then the mud fell off.9. She ran after the garbage truck, yelling "Am I too late for the garbage?" The driver said "No, jump in!"10. Remember: Marriage is the number one cause of divorce.11. I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was "Always".12. I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.13. The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked "What's on the TV?" I said "Dust!"
  6. New joke

    GREATER LOS ANGELES AREA DRIVER'S LICENSE APPLICATION: Birth name: ____________________ Stage name: ____________________ Agent's name:___________________ Attorney/Solicitor's name:_______________________ Therapist's name:_________________ Plastic Surgeon's name:_________________ Sex: ___male ___female ___formerly male ___formerly female ____both *If female, indicate breast implant size: _______ Will the size of your implants hinder your ability to safely operate a motor vehicle in any way? Yes___ No ___ Please list brand of cell phone: ________. *If you don't own a cell phone, please explain:________________________ Hair color: Females: [ ] Blonde [ ] Platinum Blonde Teenagers: [ ] Red [ ] Orange [ ] Green [ ] Purple [ ] Blue [ ] Skinhead Please check activities you perform while driving: (Check all that apply) [ ] Eating [ ] Drinking Starbucks coffee [ ] Applying make-up [ ] Shaving (male or female) [ ] Talking on cell phone [ ] Applying cellulite treatment to thighs [ ] Tanning [ ] Snorting cocaine [ ] Watching TV [ ] Reading Daily Variety / Hollywood Reporter [ ] Surfing the net via laptop [ ] Discharging / Reloading firearms If you are the victim of a car jacking, you should immediately: a) Call the police to report the crime. Call Channel 9 News to report the crime, then watch your car on the news in a high speed chase. c) Call your attorney and discuss lawsuit against cellular phone company for 911 call not going through. d) Call your therapist. In the event of an earthquake, you should : a) stop your car keep driving and hope for the best. c) immediately use your cell phone to call all loved ones. d) pull out your video camera and obtain footage for Channel 9. In the instance of rain, you should: a) never drive over 5 MPH. drive twice as fast as usual. c) you're not sure what "rain" is. Please indicate number of therapy sessions per week: ______. Which of the following medications are you taking? (Check all that apply) a) Prozac Zovirax c) Lithium d) Zanax e) Valium f) Zoloft g) Wellbutrin h) All of the above i) None of the above *If none of the above, please explain: __________________. Length of daily commute: a) Less than 1 hour * If less than 1 hour, please explain:____________________. 1 hour c) 2 hours d) 3 hours e) 4 hours or more f) None * If none, please explain:____________________. When stopped by police, you should: a) pull over and have your driver's license and insurance form ready. try to outrun them by driving the wrong way on the 405 Freeway. c) have your video camera ready and provoke them to attack, thus ensuring yourself of a hefty lawsuit.
  7. New joke

    A city boy, Kenny, moved to the country and bought a donkey from an old farmer for $100.00. The farmer agreed to deliver the donkey the next day.The next day the farmer drove up and said, "Sorry son, but I have somebad news, the donkey died."Kenny replied, "Well then, just give me my money back."The farmer said, "Can't do that. I went and spent it already."Kenny said, "OK then, just unload the donkey."The farmer asked, "What ya gonna do with him?"Kenny, "I'm going to raffle him off."Farmer, " You can't raffle off a dead donkey!"Kenny, "Sure I can. Watch me. I just won't tell anybody he is dead."A month later the farmer met up with Kenny and asked, "What happened with that dead donkey?"Kenny, "I raffled him off. I sold 500 tickets at two dollars a pieceand made a profit of $898.00."Farmer, "Didn't anyone complain?"Kenny, " Just the guy who won. So I gave him his two dollars back."
  8. New joke

    A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again. She put an ad in the local newspaper that read: “Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”
  9. 20 Most Important Red Tractors

    Without a doubt those should be in the book.
  10. CAFES show

    I bet that will pull in some big guns. Im sure it would be worth going out to attend that one.
  11. Touchy subject

    The children don't know the differance and more often then not blame themselves. They will even cover for their abusive parent when asked about a bruise or welt on their skin saying the dog did it or they fell. It's an old school method of discipline and even though we as adults seam to have found a way to justify it dosent make it right. I will go on record as saying thats how I was raised but have never practiced that method and never will. There are other ways without using physical force.
  12. Somebody come buy this

    That could easily need about 20 thousand dollars worth of TLC. I bet that scraper sitting in the background was what it pulled.
  13. Cool old Kenny

    Your Pete is a beauty.