Back in my younger, wilder days I used to say "Beer gets me tipsy, whiskey gets me drunk, tequila gets me felony charges."
For seven years my wife stayed home with the kids while I worked. She started back working a couple weeks ago, and I am off this week. Since she always did fine job keeping the house I thought I would do that for her while she was gone, so I was gonna take care of the kids, do the cleaning, and have supper ready this week. I didn't even make it through the first day before I started drinking on the job. I dont think I'm meant to be domesticated.