Lars (midessa) Posted January 18 Posted January 18 “that boy is just smart enough to be dangerous”. ”he is so discombobulated, he can’t poop straight”. ”if she had a hole in her from every man she’s been with, she’d look like Swiss cheese”. 2 Quote
Chester5732 Posted January 18 Posted January 18 If she had as many sticking out of her as she has had sticking in her she would look like a porcupine. 3 Quote
B.B. Posted January 18 Posted January 18 "I swear that guy could tear up an anvil with a rubber mallet" 2 Quote
Powered by IH Posted January 19 Posted January 19 How many people have heard this one? "And you wonder why we can't have nice things." 7 Quote
BrunsFarms Posted January 19 Posted January 19 8 minutes ago, Powered by IH said: How many people have heard this one? "And you wonder why we can't have nice things." Mom AND Dad always said that! 2 Quote
B.B. Posted January 19 Posted January 19 19 minutes ago, Powered by IH said: How many people have heard this one? "And you wonder why we can't have nice things." I say that one constantly at work.... 5 Quote
Alan Dinan Posted January 19 Posted January 19 You’re a pain, and not the kind that you see through 3 Quote
acem Posted January 19 Author Posted January 19 Tighter than a whore's dream. Harder than a preachers D***. Quote
EJQ Posted January 19 Posted January 19 Any time you'd start complaining about chores or something Dad's response was If you're looking for sympathy you can find it in the dictionary between syphilis and $h1t 6 Quote
Farmallh194012345 Posted January 19 Posted January 19 If your pounding nails and your miss one my dad would yell airball and say that means your peckers still growin. 😂 2 1 Quote
DT Fan Posted January 20 Posted January 20 On 1/19/2026 at 8:36 AM, EJQ said: Any time you'd start complaining about chores or something Dad's response was If you're looking for sympathy you can find it in the dictionary between syphilis and $h1t That's one I've trotted out a few times..... Quote
DT Fan Posted January 20 Posted January 20 12 minutes ago, BrunsFarms said: Dumber than a box of rocks. Or a bag of hammers. 4 Quote
iowaboy1965 Posted January 20 Posted January 20 A former coworker said "any tools the right tool, as long as you know how to use it." 1 Quote
int 504 Posted January 20 Posted January 20 Harley rider to BMW rider "Do you have a large wrench I can borrow?" "What size do you need?" "It don't matter I'm goin to use it for a hammer anyways". 1 7 Quote
Lars (midessa) Posted January 20 Posted January 20 The first person that bitches about dinner, cooks the next meal. (this one is mine) 5 Quote
560Dennis Posted January 20 Posted January 20 Don’t argue with idiot’s ,! , it make you one also ! 1 Quote
TroyDairy Posted January 21 Posted January 21 Dad: They sold em like they are going out of style More X than you can shake a stick at. Well ill be switched Slower than a 7 year itch Me: Fair? Thats where we show calves and go on rides I didnt say that You know people with 3 boys know what quiet is? (We have 3 girls 18 16 12) 4 Quote
edwardporter1 Posted January 21 Posted January 21 When describing a male prosthetic. Harder than Chinese arithmetic. 1 Quote
nepoweshiekfarmalls Posted January 21 Posted January 21 Any tool can be the right tool in the hands of a craftsman. You would be in a much better place if you talked less and listened more. Don't tell your Mother! The other Right, the other Right!! He is worthless as tits on a boar. Don't make me explain it to you the hard way. This will hurt me more than it hurts you. I'm your Dad, that's why. Even if She's wrong, your Mother is right. Secret to marriage: smile and nod. 5 Quote
B.B. Posted January 22 Posted January 22 Here's one of mine and I'm a dad so it counts... "If, Ifs and buts was beer and nuts I'd open a bar" Feel free to use it I haven't copyrighted it lol Quote
vtfireman85 Posted January 22 Posted January 22 On 1/20/2026 at 5:34 PM, Lars (midessa) said: The first person that bitches about dinner, cooks the next meal. (this one is mine) Quote
BrunsFarms Posted January 22 Posted January 22 17 hours ago, nepoweshiekfarmalls said: Don't tell your Mother! 17 hours ago, nepoweshiekfarmalls said: I'm your Dad, that's why. Even if She's wrong, your Mother is right. I heard those a lot! Quote
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