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Stupid should hurt


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16 hours ago, 1466fan said:

Worst I have seen was a stihl weedeater. I had lost my manual so I found a pdf and downloaded to my phone. Page after page of warnings. More warnings than actual info. Stuff like don't weedeat your leg. Don't weedeat your arm. Don't weedeat your foot. Well no s###. I'm not a rocket scientist but momma didn't raise no moron either. 

For each one of those warnings was some dumb sh*t that actually did it, got hurt, found a lawyer, and won some money.

It won't be long before the first page of the manual contains the following:

 

"Welcome new Stihl owner! We thank you for purchasing our product and hope that it will serve you for many years to come.

We say this because our legal department says that nobody should actually use the product out of fear that you will hurt yourself and blame us. This includes our entire line of products, including 2-stroke oil. You might spill it, contaminate a "navigable waterway", and kill your neighbor's pet spotted owl.

In fact, how about you just return the product to the place of purchase and get your money back. Go buy an equivalent product made in China and imported by a reseller that will file for bankruptcy about the time your lawsuit reaches the court."

 

                   - Matt

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4 hours ago, Diesel Doctor said:

I seen a Yield Sign at a railroad crossing.

Apparently someone didn't and got into an argument with the train. (Which can hurt, a lot!)

I love how the news reports a train hitting a car?

Sounds like the train jumped the track intentionally to hit the car.

You just can't fix stupid!

 

You gotta watch those trains - they'll just wander around looking for cars to hit.

It's not like they follow some predictable path bordered by long steel beams, accented by large wooden cross members, and elevated on a lengthy pile of stone....

 

                - Matt

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NINETY NINE POINT NINE NINE NINE PERCENT of these warnings are there so people can't INTENTIONALLY do something stupid, get a lawyer, and sue the company for millions of dollars because "you didn't say not to."

Oh they can still intentionally do something stupid, but they get nothing because the manual said not to do it.

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Just think of all the lives we saved by eliminating smoking, then along comes Covert19 and they all are lost anyway.

Or exactly how many IQ points were gained by the elimination of lead based paint? At the time it was lead based paint that created slow learning student groups.

I bought a pole saw the other day, there was a warning that sharpening the chain would cause harmful exposure to toxic metals.  Just think of stupidity of the warning, on a machine capable of cutting your head off, they also want you to worry about toxic metal exposure from sharpening the blade!

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51 minutes ago, twostepn2001 said:

CAUTION:  Do not attempt to start your new chainsaw in this manner. Could possibly do damage to your future family tree.

 

chainsaw.JPG

In this instance, it SHOULD do damage to his future family tree. 😏

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1 hour ago, twostepn2001 said:

CAUTION:  Do not attempt to start your new chainsaw in this manner. Could possibly do damage to your future family tree.

 

chainsaw.JPG

That's called doing society a favor.

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I know this is in kinda “Darwin’s laws” at its finest, but my b**ch is the lawyers, the government, the victims, even sometimes the perps families going after the gunmakers, the gun stores, the ammo makers, and anyone else involved with a mass shooting, any type of shooting, it’s never looked at that these scumbags are anti social psychos to the extreme and would do damage with or without whatever gun/guns they use but the lawyers and the public seem to think putting a blame on a company or companies making a viable product is the way to go and never blaming a system that may or may not be able to correct these disturbed individuals.

just a thought.

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Then there is the "the state of California knows that this product causes cancer!" warning.

According to them EVERYTHING causes cancer...

Mike

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"Do not put screws in mouth", as I often mention to clients while I put a couple of drywall screws between my lips for imminent use.

Some dimwit with a lawyer on retainer choked on a screw, you can bet on that.

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8 hours ago, mrsell said:

You gotta watch those trains - they'll just wander around looking for cars to hit.

It's not like they follow some predictable path bordered by long steel beams, accented by large wooden cross members, and elevated on a lengthy pile of stone....

 

                - Matt

At the risk of sounding like MTO, I did know a girl in high school who was ugly enough to make a freight train turn down a dirt road....

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38 minutes ago, ihrondiesel said:

At the risk of sounding like MTO, I did know a girl in high school who was ugly enough to make a freight train turn down a dirt road....

Ohh you mean the gurl who fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.

 

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3 hours ago, mikem said:

Then there is the "the state of California knows that this product causes cancer!" warning.

According to them EVERYTHING causes cancer...

Mike

That's my personal favorite. A few years back at the farm the guy who was mixing feed over the weekend backed into a utility pole and knocked the transformer off causing it to hit the ground and break open. I called the power company that Monday and they came out to fix it. While the crew was there I went over to see how things were going and I got the impression they were not impressed. The foreman asked if we had a way of cleaning the oil that was on the ground because it was hazardous and depending on what year the transformer was built may contain chemicals known to cause cancer in California. Me being a smarta$$ I replied " well I guess it's a good thing we aren't in California ". The look on that guys face was priceless.

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