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I am closing this topic. If you want to share Facebook memes, please feel free to do so over there, not here on the forum. Since this joke topic has been shut down on multiple occasions, any future jo

“A man and his girlfriend die in a car accident and meet Peter at the Pearly Gates. Peter says, “Welcome to Heaven, do you have any questions?” To which the man replies, “Yes, my girlfriend and I neve

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4 hours ago, oldtanker said:

Image may contain: text that says 'SOME DAYS, THE SUPPLY OF AVAILABLE CURSE WORDS IS INSUFFICIENT TO MEET MY DEMANDS.'

 

Rick

This has happened to me, and my vocabulary is pretty full, but there were things that it couldn't cut it.

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A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?"
 
The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?"
 
The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes I am. But let me ask you something.
 
If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?
 
Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?
 
Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?
 
Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?
 
Or if I asked for some Irish whisky, would you ask if I was Irish?"
 
The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't."
 
The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?"
 
The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."
 
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While shopping earlier today I picked up some chicken legs. Just before the young lady rang them up I asked if she knew whether they were front or back legs. She paused for a moment, read everything she could on the package and not finding the answer said, "I don't know. Let me go ask my manager". She came back a few minutes later, looked at me and said, "NOT FUNNY!!"

 

 

Rick

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3 minutes ago, oldtanker said:

Image may contain: food

While shopping earlier today I picked up some chicken legs. Just before the young lady rang them up I asked if she knew whether they were front or back legs. She paused for a moment, read everything she could on the package and not finding the answer said, "I don't know. Let me go ask my manager". She came back a few minutes later, looked at me and said, "NOT FUNNY!!"

 

 

Rick

My first maneuver with reserves I was told to go out to range and bring back 50 yards of firing line. 16 year old punk with a bunch of regulars, sorta had it figured but I did as I was told.

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Just now, amsashooter said:

And that is why you have to make up compound swear words!

I invented compound swear words.......

Rick

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